Oh and how the darkness has become so familiar. I feel it more than ever right now. Sleeping in an air mattress (with a hole in it.. Yeah I literally inflate that thing twelve times a night) in a furniture less apartment all by myself. No money to do anything, no technology to keep me caught up in school, no motivation to get out there and get a new job, no boyfriends because the only thing scarier than commitment is sitting down and accepting the fact I’m truly the singlest mother out there and it is hard. And it isn’t gonna get better by being a lazy cry baby. It’s gonna get better with hard work and perseverance…

Easier said than done..

Oh and how the darkness has become so familiar. I feel it more than ever right now. Sleeping in an air mattress (with a hole in it.. Yeah I literally inflate that thing twelve times a night) in a furniture less apartment all by myself. No money to do anything, no technology to keep me caught up in school, no motivation to get out there and get a new job, no boyfriends because the only thing scarier than commitment is sitting down and accepting the fact I’m truly the singlest mother out there and it is hard. And it isn’t gonna get better by being a lazy cry baby. It’s gonna get better with hard work and perseverance…

Easier said than done..

Struggle molds.. It shapes you into who you are meant to be. I used to really let myself be filled with anger all directed towards the fact that I had to struggle. Now I am thankful (not EVERY day) for the struggle because I quite like who i have become :0)

Struggle molds.. It shapes you into who you are meant to be. I used to really let myself be filled with anger all directed towards the fact that I had to struggle. Now I am thankful (not EVERY day) for the struggle because I quite like who i have become :0)

Something I’m definitley going I look into after I overcome my eating disorder :0)

Something I’m definitley going I look into after I overcome my eating disorder :0)

You can be sad, cry, feel sorry for yourself, get angry, punch a chair, drink till your drunk, be upset… But you HAVE to get over it and be happy afterwards. Otherwise these emotions will become who you are… You are better than your moments of weakness.

You can be sad, cry, feel sorry for yourself, get angry, punch a chair, drink till your drunk, be upset… But you HAVE to get over it and be happy afterwards. Otherwise these emotions will become who you are… You are better than your moments of weakness.

My once best friend that had to end.

Today I was at Quaker steak and lube with my best friend and I found out that my old best friend who slept with my child’s father in feeble attempt for the both of them to get back at me. Now my first reaction as a realized all hat separated us was a wall.. Was to bolt. I have gone over what I would do over and over in my head a thousand times and I was pretty sure I was gonna beat that ass….

But then I was talked down. They broke character by Throwing moral value out he window and using something so personal and meaningful to be cruel to someone else. I’m going somewhere in life and they are two lowlifes with little to know respect for themselves.. BOOM BITCHES.. You will not make me feel bad anymore and I refuse to sink to your level and respond to your ignorance :0)

Thanks Tiff and Whit :0)

This Moment

The only thing Getting me through this moment is you guys. I know I’m not alone in my struggle.